Choosing Your Maid of Honor

August 4, 2009 | editorial team

Great girlfriends are irreplaceable, indispensable and intricate parts of our lives. (I know I certainly could never live without mine!) Your maid of honor is a wonderfully important person in your wedding, and who you choose can have a big impact on your whole wedding planning experience. Whether shes your big sister, your best friend, or someone else entirely, be sure to choose someone who you love and trust, who makes you feel fantastic when youre around her, and who has the time, energy and enthusiasm to really stand by your side from beginning to end. When you ask her, be very clear about the role you would like her to play, and give her time to think it over to be sure she feels up to the job.

Choosing your maid of honor and bridesmaids for your wedding, Image by Ira Lippke Studios
(Image by Ira Lippke Studios)

The traditional responsibilities of your maid of honor usually include the following. Use this list as a reference point and add and subtract duties that are specific to your wedding and to your personal style:

  • Your maid of honor will help you pick out your wedding dress and the look for the whole bridal party. Shell help coordinate fittings, and help ensure everyone in the wedding party arrives at your wedding with all the items they should have with them.
  • She will throw you a bridal shower and bachelorette party, buy her bridesmaids dress and give you a wedding gift. A Maid of Honors expenses can really add up, so keep her resources in mind and be aware if you are expecting her to reach outside her financial comfort zone. Consider contributing funds yourself if the items or events that are important to you come with a big price tag.
  • She will tactfully let people know where youre registered for bridal shower and wedding gifts.
  • Shell be the go-to gal for all kinds of information when youre not available- where the rehearsal dinner is, what time to arrive at the ceremony, where to get parking validated, and whos responsible for which delegated duties. Be sure you let her know any important information that you think people may be asking her.
  • On the big day shell help you get dressed and ready, walk down the aisle in front of you, straighten your veil after you arrive at the altar, hold your flowers and his ring during the ceremony, sign your marriage license, bustle your dress before your reception, and run interference- acting as backup hostess when appropriate so you can stay calm and relaxed throughout your day.

Your Maid of Honor is there to lend her support to you, but dont forget to support her as well. Be considerate and grateful for all she’s doing to bring your wedding to life, and your friendship will continue to grow long after your wedding day!

Choosing your maid of honor and bridesmaids for your wedding
(Images by Cheri Pearl Photography, Jasmine Star Photography, Sarah Yates Photography, John and Joseph Photography, Natalie Moser Photography, Elizabeth Messina Photography, and Cheri Pearl Photography)

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  1. This makes me so happy about my choice for MOH. She’s amazing, resourceful, coordinated, friendly, and not afraid to get out there and boogie. What would we do without these girls???

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